For weeks, I woke up at 3 a.m. sharp, convinced my body had conspired against me. I chalked it up to perimenopause, hormones, or the universe just playing a cruel joke. Those sleepless nights became a routine. I’d shuffle to the kitchen, search for coffee, find random unfinished laundry, and get sucked into the chaos of starting my day way too early, all while trying to survive brain fog that made remembering my own name feel like an accomplishment.
But last night, something miraculous happened. After weeks of playing detective, I figured it out: my central heating turns on at exactly 3 a.m. Every. Single. Night. That little “click” and the subsequent hum of warmth was just loud enough to pull me out of whatever dream I was having (probably one where I was actually getting a full night’s sleep). All this time, it wasn’t my hormones waking me up, it was my radiator auditioning for its role in my personal 3 a.m. drama.
So, last night, I turned off the heating. And you know what happened? I slept. I mean, really slept. Not that toss-and-turn, kind-of-restful, semi-conscious sleep. I’m talking a glorious seven-plus hours of uninterrupted, drool-on-the-pillow, who-am-I-when-I-wake-up sleep. And let me tell you, it was life-changing.
This is a drawing out of one of my journals
When I woke up, the sun was actually shining, something I hadn’t seen in weeks. Between the rare winter sunshine and the fact that I wasn’t dragging myself through the fog of sleep deprivation, my mood went from meh to buzzing. I tackled the day like someone who had just discovered caffeine for the first time. I wasn’t just functioning; I was thriving.
But as I reflected on it, I realized I’m still proud of the way I handled those sleepless weeks. Even though the central heating was my sneaky culprit, I didn’t let those 3 a.m. wake-ups defeat me. I embraced the chaos, made mugs (a lot of mugs), and found humor in the absurdity of it all.
And yes, the brain fog is still here. It’s not like one good night’s sleep magically cured the fact that I walked into the kitchen today and forgot why I was there. But that’s okay. Sleep helps, sunshine helps, and laughing at yourself? That helps the most.
So here’s my takeaway: sometimes the things that disrupt our lives are as simple as a thermostat clicking on at the wrong time. Other times, they’re bigger, messier, and harder to fix. But either way, we adapt, we find a way to cope, and when the fog starts to lift, we appreciate those sunny moments even more. Sometimes we are searching it way to big and miss the right reason.
And if you need me tonight? I’ll be sleeping soundly, the heating turned off, dreaming of more sunshine, and fewer interruptions.