This is basically a universal formula for these kind of situations and while I have not had a chance to apply it yet as we generally have a very peaceful relationship I think it is going to help with a majority of the situations where I tend to get defensive.

That's quite a comprehensive list man and I think, yours and mine match to some extent, with me taking too many things personally. I too plan to follow this universal formula to stay calm and control my mood - it happens rarely but then it should be completely stopped. It's wiser for a man to be silent (especially after forties) - you can never win a women's heart otherwise, because they don't know what they want and they expect you to know that😀