I never met him, he was long dead before I was born but I could make a whole write up about him as if I had sat with him to listen to his words of wisdom and inspiring lifestyle. His daughters, my mum and aunties wouldn't stop sharing about their life with him during his lifetime.
He never had a son from his wife, my grandma but from the stories I've heard about him, he loved his daughters enough for me to wish I had met him alive to experience a bit of his love as a grandpa to his granddaughter. He was one of a kind even to his grand and great grand children who never got to meet him.
He was icon to his large family and relatives, the only one who was able to move out to a far away land with his family to start a new life. My mum said they loved living in that place until her dad (my grandpa) fell sick and died, it was a really painful time for the family that mere hearing the story, I feel sad too.
Grandpa didn't leave this world in his old age as he died much earlier when mum was still a young girl. Grandma did all her best to keep his family alive and striving but nothing could occupy the space he left behind in the family. It has always been a sad story for the family whenever it was raised especially with a revelation that his own mum had a hand in his death, I still find it hard to believe that part of the story.
It's been like over 30 years since grandpa left this world but he has been living in our memories. Three years ago, his children decided to plan a death memorial ceremony for him and also to obey a tradition I didn't ask much to know about. Before the day finally came, there were the workload, expenses and arguments that our family had to face with to make the day possible.
It was the first time I saw my grandma looked all blue and too calm, she must have been reminiscing about her time with her husband or maybe not, but I felt sad watching her. The day wasn't met to be a sad one and we the children made sure of that, we laughed and danced to music after listening to a few more words about grandpa when he was alive.
The ceremony brought our big family together after a very long time, that was another reason to be happy for that day. We took a lot of pictures, I met my cousins and far relations even though we knew little about each other, it didn't feel that way when we were around each other.
Back then, I couldn't help but imagine grandpa watching his family from above and smiling that we could actually find such a beautiful day to gather together and be happy instead of crying about his death. It was a day filled with a mixture of joy and sadness but very memorable.
It wasn't a huge celebration as the intention and focus was what mattered. People gathered to watch, a few questioned what was going on and many came as invitees. My sister and I were there to be with mum, I was opportune to support a bit in the financial aspect of the ceremony and it made me feel both proud an grateful.
The ceremony was successful and thinking back to it was unavoidable when I came across the pictures in my phone gallery. I'm really happy to find this community, I have a lot of moments to revisit using pictures and writing. Looking forward to sharing more and reading about others throwback stories.
All Images used are mine
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