Birthdays come and go mostly unrecognised and uncelebrated for me, I like it that way - I mean my own birthday, just to clarify that point. I just don't feel right celebrating something that I didn't work towards achieving and certainly don't expect others to do it either. Popping out of a womb and into the world required no effort on my part, I just sort of slipped out then got a smack on my little cute ass by the doctor to get me breathing and that was that. No effort on my part, although I'm still trying to track that fucken doctor down as I owe him a smack...with compounding interest.
So anyway, recently I had a birthday and, against my usual strict and uncompromising no celebration policy I allowed celebrations to occur. My girl-person made somewhat of a big deal out of it and I had @mrbonkers here and he was really excited to do a birthday celebration with me (which has never occurred before). I love that kid, the best nephew ever, so it was a nice and pretty special time...and I enjoyed it a lot but don't fucken tell anyone I said that or they may want to do it again next year.
It was pretty low-key.
I did a BBQ at home: Steak and chicken (marinated with my secret marinade that'll I can't tell you about) and chorizo sausage, a couple salady things, garlic bread (I even had a slice myself), a legit cold cuts/cheese platter and later on some cheese cake. (No candles of course, I'm not fucken 5 years old.) I made all the food, cooked the BBQ and did all the cleaning up. I know, right? I chose to do that though as the whole birthday thing makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable so I used that as a way to sort of divert those thoughts and the attention away from me. I relaxed as well though, had a water fight with @mrbonkers because it was hot and had a pretty decent time.
Now I'm 138
I'm at an age when I can legitimately think about retirement the non-work phase of my life.
I recall being a kid when I didn't have a professional job and life's complexities and remember fondly all the awesome things I was able to do, the enjoyment and lack of stress and all that...and I'm now close to regaining that situation which I'm looking forward to. I have a lot of things lined up and think I'll need another 138 years to get them all done, but I'll be happy to die before then knowing my life was designed and created (largely by me) and that I chose to live it as best I can rather than be a wage-slave for its entirety. I have a full life now but it'll open up a little more in my non-work phase.
Turning 138 wasn't so bad and neither was the little celebration I had with a small portion of my family; we're scattered all over the world so it's difficult to all gather together but on the night we had a video chat with my brother @tarazkp and my niece @smallsteps which was nice. As for getting older, well that's not something I'm all that worried about, it's going to happen. Sure, I'd like to be 32 again but if I was I'd not know what I've learned in the intervening years and it's those things that help make my life better in the moment.
I like the quote by George Bernard Shaw above and it makes me think about how I've managed my life.
Yeah I've had bad times, (monumentally bad), and I've had the best times too but throughout I've never lost that part of me that sought to have fun, be my genuine self and have the honesty and individuality to live my life my own way and under the code of honour and integrity (as I see it) that's so important to me. I am responsible for my own life so moving into the next part of it (the part before I fucken die and become forgotten) I maintain that same ethos and seek to keep playing...until it's game over.
Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp
[Original and AI free]
Image(s) in this post are my own
